Bat Cave Challenge 2: Stephanie
by MiamiBabe
Summary: Stephanie's musing right before TS ends and immediately after. My close eyed wish for who she should pick.


_**Just my take on what happened right before TS ended and right after. **_

_**As always I don't anything or anyone. JE owns all characters, I just take them out to play especially Ranger ;) **_

_**I'd love to hear from you, so please let me know what you think. **_

_**I hope you enjoy! **_

**_Luisa_

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**Bat Cave Challenge: Stephanie**

**By **

**MiamiBabe**

_Warning spoilers through TS_

The irony of me finally telling Joe that I loved him, right after my epiphany of how much I was _in love_ with Ranger was not lost on me. And surprisingly enough, it wasn't lost on Joe either.

He never mentioned the panic attack after his initial comment about never having seen me react so badly to a near death experience.

But he silently watched me. Every day when he would come to the hospital to check in with me, I would see the sadness in his eyes grow deeper. And then a couple of days ago, he confronted me with the inevitable question; the question that until recently I couldn't even answer for myself. _Was I in love with Ranger?_

I knew in that moment I had to stop stringing him along. It wasn't fair to him. He deserved someone that would love him unconditionally, with no reservations or doubts and I think we both finally knew I would never be that person for him.

But what I didn't expect, what I wasn't at all prepared for, was how our break up turned out. It was so out of character for both of us…peaceful and rational…a goodbye we both could be proud of. It was a sign that we were finally growing up.

_I felt the intensity of his gaze as he stoically waited for me to respond. But I didn't know what to say. I knew what I should say, but I didn't know how tell him that I love him, but I'm not in love with him. _

_And then I made the first adult decision I've made in a long time. I was going to tell him the truth, even if it means I'll end up alone. _

_I took a deep breath and I raised my head up and looked him directly in the eyes, so he could see the sincerity of my response. "Yeah, I am." _

_As the words came out of my mouth, I closed my eyes and tensed my body as I waited for his anger to wash over me, but surprisingly it never came. After a few minutes that seemed like hours, I couldn't take the silence and I opened my eyes thinking he'd walked away. _

_But I was wrong; he was still standing in front of me with his head bowed down and his hands jammed into the pockets of his jeans. _

_He looked up at me right after I opened my eyes and he gave me a bittersweet smile. And then he did the unexpected, he pulled me into his arms and hugged me tightly while he sadly whispered in my ear, "Cupcake, I was hoping you'd outgrow him. But I think he's going to stick, isn't he?" _

_Tears began to trail down my face as I realized that this wasn't just another break like all the other times, but the real thing. Joe and I were finally accepting the fact we weren't right for each other. _

_I was holding on to him tightly and had begun to sob at the realization that our time together was coming to an end. I knew it was the right thing to do, but I did love Joe and couldn't imagine my life without him in it. So I asked him, "Can we stay friends? Maybe not right away…but eventually?" _

_He pulled away from me enough to look at me before he responded, "Cupcake, I'll always be your friend, but you're right. I'll need some time to get used to the idea that you'll be with Ranger now. But I promise, someday soon. Okay?" _

_I nodded my head while I pushed down the lump in my throat at the mention of Ranger and me together. _

"_You take all the time you need. I'm not going anywhere." I took a deep breath before I continued, "But just to set the record straight. Nothing is going to happen between Ranger and me. He's made it clear that he doesn't do relationships and I don't see him changing his position on that topic, especially after the whole Scrog mess. I just felt you deserved the truth and a real chance at happiness."_

"_Cupcake, if you don't think that man loves you, then you aren't as smart as I thought." _

"_He may love me Joe, but not the way I want or more importantly, need. He's convinced himself that being in a relationship with him is just too dangerous." _

"_Well I'm not sure I totally disagree with that sentiment, but the reality is that you're just as dangerous. Your uncanny ability to find trouble and attract so many psychos is what always drove me crazy about you." _

_He shook his head before he continued. "And although I never thought I'd say this, in some kind of weird way…you're made for each other."_

_My head snapped back. There's no way I heard him correctly. "What?" _

_Joe smiled. "Yeah you heard me right Cupcake, but don't get any ideas about telling anyone because I'll deny it until the day I die." _

_His playfulness dropped and on a turn of a dime he turned serious before he shocked me with his words. "Don't give up on him yet, Okay? Because even though it's a hard pill for me to swallow right now…you deserve a chance at happiness, too. And I think he may be the only man that will let you fly the way you've always wanted, too." _

_After picking my jaw up from the floor, I was at a loss so I tried to lighten the mood, by playfully punching his arm and said, "So what you're saying is that you are giving us your blessing?" _

_Joe let out the first real laugh I'd heard out of him in the last couple of weeks. "Yeah, I guess in some sick ex-boyfriend ritual only you and I could understand…I am." _

_I gave him one of my full-on smiles and said, "Thanks Joe. That means a lot to me." _

"_Okay Cupcake, I better get out of here before this gets any weirder and I start feeling like I'm in the twilight zone." _

_I cuffed his head. "Smartass." _

_He chuckled. Squeezed my hand one last time and turned to walk away. _

_I was watching him as he made his way back to his SUV, when I saw him half turn and threw his last words over his shoulders. "Take care of yourself okay?" _

"_I can't make any promises, but I'll try my best." _

_He chuckled, turned and kept walking towards his truck._

**LMT Bonus: **

_**Last line from TS: **_

"**_One Ranger is all you will ever need." _**

My heart clenched and a lump formed in my throat when I heard those words coming from his mouth. Luckily I was able to look away and get control of the tears that were threatening to spill.

But he's right. He is the only Ranger I'll ever need. Hell he's the only man I'll ever need, and if I'm honest he is the only man I want.

If I ever harbored doubts about the depth of my love for him, they were instantly erased when our eyes locked right before I helplessly watched as Scrog shot him over and over again.

And if that hadn't been enough to convince me, then the uncontrollable panic attack I experienced as I stared at his still body lying on the floor as blood was rapidly puddling under him did. Not to mention the emotional rollercoaster I've been riding for the past two weeks, which nailed the point home.

I tried to push the shooting and the emotions it invoked in me to the back of my mind, but it felt like my denial skills have disappeared right when I needed them the most. And I can no longer deny the truth that I, Stephanie Plum, am completely in love with Ranger…mind, body and soul.

Unfortunately, the feelings aren't reciprocated. I'm not blind. I know he cares about me and he probably even loves me to some extent, but it's not the same kind of love I feel for him. So while I've finally come to terms with my love for Ranger, I've also come to terms with the fact that he'll never be mine, at least not the way that I need or want him to be.

As if he'd read my mind Ranger whispered, "You're wrong Babe."

I looked at him puzzled. Damn! Please tell me his ESP isn't working or worse that I was thinking out loud again. "W…what are you talking about Ranger?"

He cleared his throat and looked me straight in the eyes, before he repeated, "You're wrong."

"I'm wrong about what Ranger? I haven't said anything?"

Without taking his eyes off of me, he said. "You don't need to say anything; I can see it in your face…in your eyes."

I was scared of the direction this conversation was going in, but I was tired of running. And frankly this might be my last chance to get Ranger to open up, so I decided to go for it.

After all what is the worst that could happen? I didn't have him anyway, so I couldn't lose what was never mine.

"And what exactly do you see in my face?"

He immediately responded. "Doubt."

Shit…shit…shit. I need to act as if I don't know what he's talking about. "Doubt?"

"Yes Babe, doubt. But before we continue with this conversation, I need to ask you something."

"Okay," I hesitantly answered.

"Is it true about you and Joe calling it quits?"

"Who told you?" Who am I kidding; he probably heard it from half the 'Burg within an hour of our break up.

"Does it really matter?" He quietly asked.

I shrugged. "I guess not. I was just curious."

"Tank told me. He heard it from Lula. Is this just another break?" He asked hesitantly.

I furrowed my brow, confused at his hesitancy. Almost as if he was scared to here the answer. What the hell was that about?

"It's not just a break. It's the real thing this time."

"How do you know? It's not like you haven't said that before."

"Because this time, we acted like adults and talked it out and we both agreed it wasn't ever going to work between us. We love each other, but we're not in love with each other…so it's time to move on."

He nodded and said, "Proud of you Babe." And then he kept on with our earlier conversation as if we'd never changed the subject.

"You don't think I love you and I know that's my fault with all the mind games that I've played with you. But just so you know, I've loved you for a long time now. I just didn't think I deserved you or wanted you to get hurt because of me. But I guess the past couple of weeks have shown that whether I'm in a relationship with you or not, you'll be a target anyway. But mostly, I'm tired of running from my feelings for you and denying myself the one person that I need to feel whole."

"You've loved me for a long time?" I asked in shock.

He chuckled. Amused at what part of his words I'd focused on, and quietly answered. "Yes."

"How long?"

He took a deep breath before he responded. "Going on three years, give or take."

"Three years?" Oh boy! "We've only known each other for three years!"

Not willing to wait for a response, I fired out, "When?"

"I'm not really sure anymore since I spent a good portion of that time denying my feelings for you, but if I had to guess…I'd say sometime around the time you called me to rescue you from being cuffed to the shower rod."

"What?? That was practically when we met."

He shrugged and gave me his almost smile. "What can I say? I liked you. You were feisty and bold with a little wild thrown in. You were definitely different from any other woman I'd ever met." He saw the shock and doubt in my face, so he grabbed my hand and squeezed it to reassure me he was telling me the truth before continuing, "But I can tell you when I was 100 sure that I was in love with you."

I whispered. "When?"

"The day you left me the message after I'd gone FTA and you asked me if I was okay. I knew in that moment that I would love you forever and even if I couldn't have you, I'd be there for you no matter what it cost me…even if it was my life."

I looked him directly in the eyes as tears poured down my cheeks. Reminded of how close he'd come to paying that price.

"Oh Ranger, we've been such fools! Wasting so much time we could've been together. How could we have been so stupid? Especially since we know better than most that life is short and we don't always get second chances."

"I know Babe. These past few weeks in the hospital have given me time to think and come to the same realization."

He pulled me into his arms and tilted my head back so that I could look into his eyes. "I love you Stephanie Michelle Plum with all my heart, body and mind and I will forever."

I couldn't control the tears and I was having a hard time speaking, but I wanted him to know that I felt the same way about him and that he'd made me the happiest person in the world.

I cleared my throat to find my voice. I wanted to sound strong and sure of myself when I told him for the first time the depth of my feelings for him.

"I love you, too Ricardo Carlos Manoso with all my heart, body and mind. I've loved you for so long. I was just too scared to hope. I don't want to waste another minute without you."

"Good because I'm not letting you go again."

We both smiled and our lips touched in a soft tender kiss full of promise.

"Babe?"

"Yeah?"

"Forever?"

I nodded, put my lips on his and whispered, "Forever."

_**The End**_


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